What are your main take away lessons from the assigned reading this week? Describe and explain.

This week’s reading concentrated on understanding interpersonal communication. Adler et al. (2014) assert that “Sometimes we don’t have a choice about our relationships: Children can’t select their parents, and most workers aren’t able to choose their bosses or colleagues” (p. 199). However, this is not always the case since in most cases people can actively seek or avoid people by choice. Among the factors that influence people’s choice of relational partners is appearance, similarity, complementarity, competence, reciprocal attraction, disclosure, rewards and proximity (Adler et al., 2014).

According to Adler et al. (2014), “The impersonal nature of some two-person exchanges has led some scholars to say that quality, not quantity, is what distinguishes interpersonal communication” (p. 203). Interpersonal communication tends to occur when people tend to treat each other as unique individuals, despite the number of people involved or context in which the interactions occur.  Mediated relationships have shown that they can become contextually interpersonal. People tend to stay in touch via e-mail, tweets, text messaging, IM and other social networking platforms. However, online interaction has proven to be an inferior substitute for face to face communication. Most people that rely on meeting their communication needs through the internet tend to find it difficult while trying to maintain face to face communication.

On the issue of intimacy in interpersonal relationships, even the closest of relationships tend to have a mixture of interpersonal and personal communication.  People usually alternate between “me” and “we” orientation. There are times they focus on connecting with others while on other times they tend to focus on their own needs. Intellectual sharing has been touted among the things that might result to the development of intimacy between people. The moment people are exchanging vital ideas, there is a form of closeness that develops between them.

How will they affect the way you communicate?

In my line of career, having the ability to execute face to face communication without any problems is paramount. As a result, I will ensure that I am not much absorbed into mediated interactions to a greater extent such that they have the potential of ruining this ability. This is because reliance on online communication might make it difficult to encounter people on face to face basis given what one is used to.

Having an understanding of how interactions are likely to have an impact on intimacy issues, I have to establish caution on this issue. Sometimes when I encounter an individual that we resonate on an intellectual level, I have the tendency of sharing a lot. I have learned that this might send an unintended message to the other party, and I will, therefore, have to be careful on this issue.

In what ways do the concepts in the videos and readings relate to your professional life in education?

The videos involved in this week’s reading have very informative content. The video on “Dating Techniques – Science of Attraction” uses speed dating to show that people usually find others attractive for different reasons.  Two people might have a contrasting opinion about a certain individual with regards to attraction upon their interaction. How one communicates with the other person, is also likely to influence their interest in dating them.

The video on “3 types of (digital) lies” informs on how people lie on a daily basis. Jeff Hancock asserts that the use of technology has made it even worse. The probability of people lying when they are communicating on phones or through the internet is even higher. Everyone can attest to this in their day to day interactions with others. What makes lying on this situations high is the fact that people receiving the information cannot review nonverbal cues to tell what the other party really feels.

“When Harry Met Sally Men and Women Cannot Be Friends” applies to the concept of intimacy in interpersonal relationships. In any professional life, when a man and woman become extremely close, they tend to share a lot between them. This creates a high probability of there being intimacy between the two individuals.

Frank Warren in “Half a million Secrets” has shown how anonymity can be an enabler of communication. People find it easy to confide in strangers on issues that they think they would be judged on. They feel they have the freedom of pouring their hearts out and feel some form of relief. This is the same thing that happens with mediated communication hence making face to face communication difficult.

“What you don’t know about Marriage” on the other hand shows how often people divorce regardless of the period they have been married. It remains to be a dilemma on how two people that could not get enough of each other, but the moment they are married no one wants to see the other. It is either people change, or they have been pretending all along, and they are now showcasing their true character. These are things that can be easily observed in life.

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